Just finished watching the Prisoner Miniseries. Not to bad in and of itself. Definately not the original TV series, though.

Plus I don't care if he was Jesus, Patrick McGoohan could kick Jim Caviezel's ass.

Dear Discovery Channel/History Channel/etc.:

Dan Brown writes FICTION. Fiction means NOT TRUE.

 FICTION DOES NOT WORK THAT WAY!!!

According to the movie Forrest Gump, "life is like a box of chocolates." I realized today this is true.

Like a box of chocolates, if you're in life long enough, eventually you get down to the ones that make you say "What the fuck was that?".

ARE YOUR INFOMERCIALS LACKING A CERTIAN SOMETHING? WELL I KNOW EXACTLY WHAT IT IS: BILLY MAYS. THAT'S RIGHT, FOLKS, BILLY MAYS HAS DIED. CALL NOW AND GET ONE FREE BLOG POST DONE IN HIS STYLE AS A TRIBUTE TO BILLY.

I get some international hits on this blog (hi guys, saw you in the log file stats), so this one goes out as a bit of a public service announcement. Sometimes you might notice Americans can seem somewhat... how shall I put this nicely... bat shit crazy. 

So since about Sunday the news has been dominated by swine flu¹. All swine, all the time! You get TV news saying things like:

"Although there's nothing to support that this is an act of bioterrorism, there's nothing to rule it out, either."

Yep. 9/11 was perpetrated with a couple of guys who new how to fly a plane (well, half knew how to fly a plane, the landing half not so good) armed with box cutters. And if I remember my biology correctly, genetic engineering of virulent microorganisms is trivial once one has mastered the intricacies of box cutting technology.

Or:

"OK, this isn't a pandemic yet. But what would one look like?"

This isn't a marauding army of blood-thirsty grizzly bears roaming the countryside, devouring all the children they encounter. But let's simulate what that would look like.

Take Monday's xkcd. Now imagine that Twitter feed is a list of cable news reporters. It's like that.

Yeah, the people at the Centers for Disease Control are worried. That's their fucking job. They worry about diseases, and how to control them. A clever reader may have already deduced that from the name. I understand they have degrees and everything. Let's listen to what the nice folks at the CDC have to say before we start planning the final battle between good and evil, mmmmkay?

So getting back to the Americans seeming bat shit crazy sometimes. We have this expression, "garbage in, garbage out". In this case, think of it as "bat shit crazy in, bat shit crazy out."

¹Not to make light of the 149 deaths in Mexico. Condolences there.

10. Snape kills Adama.

9. Apollo was dead the whole time.

8. Jimi Hendrix brought back to life via Cylon resurrection, beats Sam to death with his guitar.

7. Baltar makes an excellent piñata.

6. Cavil is Adama's father, wants Adama to join him to overthrow the Emperor and rule the galaxy.

5. Cylon model number 9: Richard Simons!

4. Athena/Caprica/Boomer three way lesbian orgy. I am soooo getting the unrated DVD when it comes out.

3. "Rosebud" was the name of Adama's sled.

2. After playing "All Along the Watchtower", Starbuck does an excellent version of "Freebird".

1. Some English guy by the name of Dent shows up in a bathrobe and a towel and starts raving that they're disrupting some great program just by being there.

Warning: the preceeding were spoilers. Spoilers are aerodynamic devices added to automotive vehicles to disrupt airflow around the vehicle, or simply to make it look cool.

Beware your Roomba. It has a plan!